Balancing Work and Recovery

Balancing addiction recovery with other aspects of your life - work, family, relationships - can be difficult. It’s important to have a support system and a plan in place to balance the important things. One of the major aspects in most people’s lives is work; it is vitally important to strike a healthy balance between your work and recovery.

Don’t stretch yourself too thin. No matter how good you’re feeling, remember to take things slow. There will be days when you feel like you need to push yourself and make up for days when you struggled. Be careful; it’s important to pace yourself and remember that you don’t have to take on every challenge that comes your way. Accept the work and assignments you can handle; as you ease into your new routine with recovery and perform well at work, you can increase the challenges you are able to take on.

Having a healthy routine can make balancing work and recovery feel more natural. Arrive to work early each day to give yourself time to settle in. Leave on time each day if possible so that you are not rushing through the rest of your day. Make sure you have a schedule that allows time for nutritious meals, exercise, sufficient rest, and quality time with family and friends who are supporting you through recovery.

While you are at work, make sure you check in with your recovery needs. Doing frequent self-checks can allow you to see what you might be missing and address it before it becomes a problem and interferes with your work. One tool you can use for this purpose is HALT:

·       Hunger- This can be a physical or emotional need. Make sure you are filling your body with nutritious foods and also that your body isn’t craving less tangible things like affection.

·       Anger- Anger is a normal response to certain experiences. If you’re feeling angry, take the time to figure out what’s causing your anger and work toward resolving it in a healthy manner.

·       Loneliness- Loneliness can occur when you’re with or without people. If you’re feeling lonely, ask yourself if you’ve reached out to anyone in your support network recently. If you haven’t, make the time to visit family and friends and recharge your social battery.

·       Tiredness- When you have too much on your plate, you can tire yourself out and neglect your needs. Make sure you are taking the time to see to your physical and emotional needs; don’t burn yourself out.

No matter how much you love your job, there will be some triggers. Triggers are everywhere, and work triggers are no different. You will need to identify the triggers in your work environment and manage them to the best of your ability. If you feel your workplace is not conducive to your recovery, you might have to find a different job or even a different role within the company. Protecting your recovery remains your most important job.

Family Support in Recovery

People struggling to break free from addiction often feel like they are struggling alone; in reality, their addictions don’t just affect them, they affect friends and family as well. This is why family support plays such a vital role in addiction recovery. As a family member, spouse, or close friend of someone in recovery, you can and should be an integral part of the process. Seeking treatment is the first step in long-term recovery, but it isn’t the only step. Loving support is an important part of the lifelong journey that is achieving freedom from addiction.

But what does family support entail? If you are a family member, spouse, or close friend of someone seeking recovery, your supporting role can be crucial to helping your loved one become who they want to be. In the early stages of recovery, support is a commitment; it is important to decide early if you are able to make that commitment to help your loved one. It is also essential for you to recognize that you and your loved one may face obstacles in their recovery. It is important to make a plan to overcome challenges such as:

·       Recovering from debt or other financial issues

·       Gaining or regaining stable employment

·       Ongoing physical and/or mental health struggles

·       Repairing relationships and trust

Addiction is a chronic, progressive disease, and there is no “quick fix” solution. While your loved one might be seeking recovery, it is important to remember that does not mean they are “cured”, as healing from addiction can be a lifelong struggle, and there will be times they stumble.

Recovering addicts can often feel isolated, but with the love, encouragement, and understanding of family and friends, continued recovery and change is possible. If you have a loved one who is a recovering addict, consider reaching out to them and offering your love and encouragement. If you are in recovery, reach out to your family and friends for support. Our loved ones will always be our greatest strength when we need them.

Putting Yourself First in Recovery

The term self-centered has a negative connotation, and understandably so. In most areas of life, being self-centered is seen as being selfish. In recovery, being self-centered has a different meaning – deciding to make yourself a priority and learning how to be independent. Being self-centered and putting yourself first is a crucial part of recovery. But how do you put yourself first?

Seek treatment and ask the tough questions. Recovery is the time to advocate for yourself. Ask yourself important questions such as:

·       How often will you see a therapist?

·       What will you do if you relapse?

·       What is your treatment philosophy?

Ask for help. Asking for help can be difficult and frightening, but it does not mean that you have failed or that you are a burden. The important thing to remember is that you have people in your life who love you and want to see you get better. Most likely, they are eagerly waiting for you to decide to put yourself and recovery first. Your friends and loved ones want to support you and encourage you to put yourself first.

Invest in recovery over the long haul. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. If you give yourself time to recover, you will start to rediscover your true self and will eventually get to the point where you love your true self. Just like with any relationship, you need to commit to recovery as an ongoing process full of difficulties and unforgettable experiences.

Remove toxic elements from your life. It’s important to really be honest with yourself. What are your current triggers? How do you set boundaries with the people in your life? Whatever your challenges and roadblocks to recovery might be, it is important to identify and work through them.

Ultimately, the important thing is not what anyone else thinks or feels about you. It is you and your recovery. It is loving yourself the way your friends and family love you and following through on that self-love by committing to positive change. As you seek recovery, do not feel ashamed to put your needs first; it is not self-centered to recover and live a more fulfilling life.

Saying No

For many people, the most difficult word in the English language is no. No matter how badly we want to say it, this two letter word is nearly impossible to get out in the best of times. Someone asks us to do something for them, and our mind says “no” but what comes out of our mouth is “yes”.

A lot of the time, of course, we should say yes. But this does not mean we should say yes to every little thing that is asked of us. In fact, if we get in the habit of always saying yes, even when we really want to say no, we increase our risk for physical and psychological problems. Research tells us that “submissive behavior”, such as saying yes when we want to say no can:

·         Compromise our immune system

·         Increase our risk for cancer

·         Create ulcers

·         Cause depression

For these reasons alone, it’s important to learn to say no. But there are plenty of other reasons to say “no”, especially for recovering addicts. For starters, feeling anxiety and stress related to commitments we’d rather not have can be a trigger to relapse. Learning to say no can limit the number of triggers in your life, allowing you to focus on recovery.

There are other good reasons for addicts and non-addicts alike to learn to say no:

·         Reduced stress- learning to say no when it is an appropriate response can help reduce the stress of added commitments.

·         Respect- people often will respect you more when you tell them no if you do it politely and stick to your refusal.

·         Time- when we learn to say no to extra things, we have more time to do the things that are important to us. We can spend time cultivating hobbies and working on things that matter (like recovery). We can spend more time with our families and improve relationships.

We are taught from a young age to people-please -- to be helpful, to be friendly, and to say yes when someone makes a request. For this, and many other reasons, saying yes is a much easier than saying no. Saying yes indiscriminately, especially when we’d be better off saying no, can cause us to lose track of the things that are actually important in our lives, like our relationships and recovery. In order to be happy in our lives and successful in recovery, it’s important to learn to say no.